Cacao Rituals: A Mother’s guide to Connection and Self-care

I often find myself reminiscing about past times filled with adventure or indulging in my books, moments when I had more time for myself. Today, with little kids to care for and nourish, those times seem like a distant dream. Like any mother would say, I cherish these moments now and wouldn’t change a thing (except perhaps to have an extra set of hands). However, despite loving the present, I sometimes feel depleted from the daily routines and the long to-do lists that come with running a family. What I’m discovering more and more is that I need self-care to provide for others while nurturing myself. One of the things I’ve discovered during this new phase is the magic of cacao rituals. These rituals have provided the balance I seek in nurturing both others and myself. They bring moments of peace, connection, reflection, and self-care into my busy life.

The Magic of Cacao Rituals

I love how cacao is referred to as the “food of the gods.” The Mayans and Aztecs treated it as a sacred plant medicine used in spiritual ceremonies and communal gatherings. The Mayans would drink cacao in elaborate rituals to connect with the divine, while the Aztecs used it in their royal courts and religious ceremonies, believing it had powerful heart-opening and healing properties. Today, the tradition of cacao rituals continues, merging ancient wisdom with modern practices to foster connection, introspection, and nourishment.

This rich heritage invites us to honor cacao as a sacred tool for personal and communal transformation. I have accepted its invitation and integrated it into my life, enriching it with these deeply craved moments. The first time I experienced cacao was at a breathwork ceremony at a local communal gathering. It took me by surprise, as I felt vulnerable sharing my experience with others while also reaching deeper into my subconscious during breathwork. It truly gave me a heart-opening experience. I felt as if I was in an altered state, more in touch with myself and eager to connect with others. It was just cacao and its theobromine content (similar to caffeine but not caffeine), along with antioxidants, minerals, and vitamins.

After this ceremony, I researched the benefits of cacao and became hooked. Not only can it substitute for coffee, which has been my addiction for years, but its benefits are much higher without the jittery sensations if I drink too much. Cacao is too rich to want to drink too much anyway.

The Benefits of Cacao Rituals

Cacao rituals have become a cornerstone of my self-care routine, offering a multitude of benefits that resonate deeply with my emotional, creative, and spiritual well-being. Emotionally, cacao provides a gentle yet profound heart-opening experience, allowing me to connect more deeply with my feelings and the people around me. It’s like a warm hug for the soul, inviting a sense of calm and compassion.

Creatively, cacao serves as a catalyst, sparking inspiration and enhancing my ability to think outside the box. Bringing attention to my intellect and consciousness, intertwined with cacao, allows me to access my energy center. Whether I’m writing, brainstorming new ideas, or simply engaging in play with my kids, I find that a cup of cacao helps unlock my imagination and flow, making me kinder and more patient.

The spiritual benefits of cacao rituals are the most profound and important to me. They offer a sacred pause in the busyness of life, a moment to reconnect with my inner self and the divine. These rituals remind me to slow down, set intentions, and cultivate gratitude, turning everyday moments into opportunities for mindfulness and reflection. Through these rituals, I’ve discovered a deeper sense of purpose and connection to my Creator and the world around me, enriching my journey and nurturing my spirit. This pause is essential for connecting with myself, refocusing my day, and aligning my priorities. With a busy schedule and kids, this pause gives me the space to be present for my duties, shutting out overwhelming emotions.

Making Cacao Rituals Work for You

Attending a communal cacao ritual weekly or even monthly would be wonderful. However, the ideal can sometimes hinder us from taking action. I decided to adjust my expectations and create a ritual that fits into my busy schedule. Whenever I get the chance to join a gathering, I seize it. There is something powerful about sharing an experience with others, connecting on a deeper level, and embracing the intimacy that such gatherings foster. Sharing our vulnerabilities, challenges, loves, pain, and desires with others creates a bond that penetrates the soul.

To partake in a cacao ritual and have a date with yourself, it’s important to find moments in your day and adjust to what works for you. I initially performed a cacao ritual daily in the afternoon to recharge and refocus, giving me the energy and zest for the second half of the day. However, after a month, I realized that daily rituals were becoming demanding and stressful. I then adjusted to doing them 2-3 times a week, mostly in the afternoon. This way, I look forward to those times for reflection and connection.

Morning rituals are also a great way to set the tone for the day. Cacao can serve as a substitute for coffee, and starting the day with a journal and gratitude practice can anchor your day in positivity.

Cacao rituals are about showing up for yourself as planned; it’s a commitment. These rituals will look different each day—sometimes you might be with a friend, other times alone, with varying focuses. The key is to remember the purpose behind these rituals: to regain the vision of your life and the mission at stake, and to contribute meaningfully to that mission while serving others.

The Heart of Cacao Rituals

Are you ready to jump in and begin this heart-opening, elevating ritual? The essential part is to make a plan and show up. Creating a sacred space is vital. The space should be inviting to ideas and creativity, meaning it should be clean and uncluttered to make space for you and the new.

Creating a cacao ritual is a beautiful and personal process that begins with setting a clear intention. As you prepare your cacao, take a moment to reflect on what you hope to achieve or invite into your life. Whether it’s clarity, peace, or creativity, allowing this intention to guide your ritual adds a layer of mindfulness and purpose.

Once your cacao is ready, sit comfortably in the prepared area. As you sip, let the warmth of the cacao ground you in the present moment. This is the perfect time for reflection; consider what thoughts or feelings arise and how they align with your intentions. Sometimes those intentions are as simple as checking my weekly to-do list to ensure they align with my long-term goals and mission.

Journaling is an excellent way to capture these reflections, turning thoughts into insights and goals. Always include a moment of gratitude in your ritual. Reflect on the things you are thankful for, both big and small, and let this gratitude fill your heart. It’s okay if every day the gratitude list looks the same; the practice will allow expansion of things to be grateful for. My advice is to focus on being grateful for relationships and experiences, not just possessions. However, there are no strict rules—if a cherished book brings you joy and gratitude, include it.

Parting Words

I’m thankful to have stumbled across cacao and integrated it as a ritual. It has enriched my life with moments of reflection, gratitude, and alignment with the divinity within me. Even if it’s just 10 minutes a day, it’s 10 minutes of renewal, connection, and nourishment. After the ritual, I often feel inspired to read psalms, connect through prayers, text a loved one, or simply be present with myself.

As busy as we are in our modern world, creating a space to reconnect is crucial. A great outdoor run or hike does it beautifully too. But sometimes, the day doesn’t give way to that, and having a cacao ritual handy can provide a much-needed moment of peace and reflection. By setting intentions, reflecting, journaling, and expressing gratitude during your cacao ritual, you create a sanctuary of mindfulness in the midst of your day. These small yet profound moments not only nourish your soul but also enhance your capacity to nurture those around you. Embrace the simplicity and magic of cacao rituals, and let them be your anchor, bringing balance, connection, and a moment of serenity.